Tuesday, July 8, 2014

How I Won an Election and Beat Mickey Mouse

How I Won an Election and Beat Mickey Mouse A Short True Story Pertinent in Election Season Lex Loeb Contributor Network . The first office I ran for was US senator of Oregon after Bob Packwood retired from the office. I ran as an art project and may have been one of the original local Portland Artists to go though with such a project. I did not try very hard at running but really just went though the motions of having my name on the primary ballot. I did not receive very many votes. It was very negligible. I later ran for Mayor of Portland on the no parking meter platform and my negligible primary vote went up I believe to around 2 percent which was better than my US Senate Run. After that I printed up art cards that said "Vote Lex Loeb for Any Office" and "Write in Lex Loeb for Any Office" and made that a long running campaign. I am still campaigning on that same platform today but put little or no effort into it Then one day , a few years ago and a couple of weeks after an election occurred I was at home and the telephone rang. I answered the phone and a woman asks me if I am Lex Loeb. I said yes and she said something like, "Congratulations, I am with Multnomah County Elections" and I calling to inform you that you won an election." She went on to say, "Glad I found you. You won the Sauvies Island Soil and Water conservation office. You tied with Mickey Mouse but we could not find Mickey Mouse in the phone book. You both got 11 votes." Clearly the county was hoping to give the job to Mickey Mouse and not to me but too bad he was not a local resident. Unfortunately for me, the Soil and Water Conservation office for Sauvies Island required the person taking the office to own at least 10 acres in the vicinity which I did not so I could not assume the office without a legal fight which would not be worth bothering with. I did end up on the soil and water conservation mailing list for a number of years as a result however. I guess there was some moral to the story? Maybe it is that it is better win an election against Mickey Mouse than to have him voting for you? I think I once became a republican precinct captain in an election where my name was written in too. Becoming an open ended write in candidate is not necessarily a bad idea, The out come really did make it a work of art. REMEMBER , Write in Lex Loeb for Any office on your election ballot. I am the very best candidate for any office. Thank You , Lex . .

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